Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
My minivan is always rocking, but it`s usually because I`m trying to smack one of the kids in the backseat while I drive.
I’m having some vision trouble today. I can’t see myself doing anything.
Karma has no menu. You get served what you deserve.
Does all this status updating make my ego look fat?
A psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog’s IQ. Here’s how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
I did a half hour on the treadmill each day last week. This week, I`m up to 1 hour a day. I`m slowly building up to actually turning it on some time in the future.
When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
I bet no one in Africa is allergic to gluten.
I don`t have a police record ... but I think I do have a Sting cd around here somewhere.
Anybody else have those FB friends that set up a FB account 4 years ago and posted once or twice and hasn`t been back on since? And you wonder how they can exist without a Life?
There`s no room in my life for B.S. ... Unless it`s burritos oand salsa
Thought I was having deja-vu. But it turns out, I do the exact same things every day.
You seem to be very educated on the things you make up.
I swear, its like EVERY payday I gotta spend money cause there`s a birthday party to go to, a wedding, a baby shower, a new video game, a new stripper, something. Always something...
I have good taste, I just don`t have the money to prove it.