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People who text back... "kk" ... Are so annoying! ....and almost racist
Ever been completely out of toilet paper that you send your kid next door to get some? Me neither, I just like to embarrass my kid.
A dog running a hundred miles to retrieve a stick? That`s pretty far-fetched.
Yeah but why do they call him Bigfoot if both of his feet are the exact same size
I always tell myself there is no such thing as a stupid question, but everyday someone tries to change my mind
When you realize that your car matches the one in the Amber Alert.
Neighbor said hi again. I`m just gonna move
if a guy tells you you`re ugly ; he wants you, if a girl tells you your ugly; she`s jealouse, if you a kid tells you your`re ugly..... you`re ugly.
All those years of getting horrible elementary school pictures was just society`s way of preparing you for your driver`s license photo.
Sorry I missed your call. I took too long to answer because I was dancing to the ringtone.
A bachelor party seems more appropriate after a divorce than before a wedding.
Of course China is dominating the olympics, they probably made all of the equipment.
Don’t judge me because I only have $4 in my pocket. Judge me because I stole it off my daughter’s night stand.
have you ever looked at someone and thought, "yeah you definitely have someone locked away in your basement."
If by time, you mean vodka, then yes, time does heal all wounds.