Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Financial status: I hope United Airlines drags me off my flight
Did anyone hear the one about the cross dresser? The happiest day in his life was when he finally got into his girlfriend`s pants.
is actually feeling pretty much okay about not accomplishing anything this year.
I`m getting really tired of being really tired of stuff.
The next time you feel you’re worthless…. just remember…. your organs are worth a LOT of money on the black market.
I think I just discovered Newton’s third law of Emotion: ..... "For every male action, there is an equal and opposite female overreaction."
Why can`t the ice cream man just get a freakin liquor license already
If your talking behind my back then guess what? Your in a pretty good position to kiss my a$$!!!!
My greatest fear is that PMS is fake and this is my real personality.
I think sharks eat people just to be on tv.
what is the first thing a homeless person does when he`s on a computer? he searches through the recycle bin
If women ruled the world there would be no wars. Just a bunch of jealous countries not talking to each other
The zoo is a pretty safe place to fart.
Due to the rising cost of ammunition I will no longer be able to provide a warning shot. Thanks for your understanding.
At least a stalker is there for you.