Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
FITNESS TIP: Set a regular gym schedule that`s easy to keep up with. For example, I work out once every 4 years after I vote for president.
I try to get in at least 30 minutes of talking about exercise every day.
I`m surrounded by sex addicts & alcoholics...So glad I found you all.
All bad decisions are ultimately made using the same piece of resounding logic: “Screw it.”
Some people have a natural talent for stupid. Others take that talent and actually ENHANCE it!
I love how when your watching a crime show and they have to tell you that "this is a reenactment" oh really? you mean you didn`t actually catch the murder on video?
#1738 "The fact that people use the wrong "your" and "there" yet spell "Bieber" correctly bothers me."-dd
Target had a credit card breach? But only with in-store purchases, not online? More proof you`re better off staying home with no pants on.
My parents preferred my imaginary friend over me.
Hello everyone. Look at your status, now back to mine, now back to yours, now back to mine. Sadly, yours isn’t mine. But if you stopped posting about other things and made this your status, yours could be like mine. Look down, back up. Where are you? You’re on Facebook, reading the status your status could be like.
If I laugh randomly when you are talking to me, don`t worry, the voices are telling me jokes.
What do you mean being awesome for another year isn`t a resolution?
Your girlfriend is rated E... For Everyone
Men use love to get sex. Women use sex to get love. I use coupons to get pizza.
If I was just learning English and you told me a sport called BOXING takes place in a SQUARE area called a RING, I`d probably give up.