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I party like a Rockstar. A very poor Rockstar who isn`t in a band anymore.
www.amish.com. How did this happen?
Do whatever you want. And if it’s something you’re going to regret in the morning…sleep late.
Lady`s if you want guys to look at your face instead of your chest ... eat a banana.
If McDonald`s was smart they`d serve breakfast until 2pm on the weekends.
apparently telling my girlfriend her acuracy is as high as a magic 8 ball wasn`t a good idea.
When buying a flat screen tv, always remember to put the box in your neighbor`s trash so you don`t get robbed.
I didn’t scream out someone else’s name during sex. I was thinking of baby names in case you get pregnant…
Daylight Savings makes us lose an hour... It’s kind of like Facebook.
I will be responsible for my actions when my actions become more responsible.
I wonder if Earth makes fun of the Moon for having no life.
You’re one of those women that my mom warned me about…Here’s my number.
You seem to have a good grip on reality. You`re new here, aren`t you?
am I the only one who would beat the sh!t out of someone for wearing a "forever lazy" to a tailgate?
So... Where does one obtain minions?