Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Beer and a 44 magnum with an everclear shot makes everything good like Nintendo
“Hangover” makes it sounds like it’s all done now. I’d like to propose the term “hanghappening”.
I love the way everyone who uses hand sanitizer looks like they`re hatching some kind of evil plan.
I’m over the 30-day ab challenge. Is there a 30-day nap challenge I can take on?
Pool party at my house, bring ur own pool..
When you get angry at someone count out loud to ten. When you get to eight, throw a punch. Nobody expects that sh!t.
My favorite sexual position is pretty much any of them. I`m just glad to be involved.
Gyms are full of people that haven`t found the right couch.
He said the spark between us was gone..so I tasered him..... Ill ask him again when he wakes up
The best way to a woman`s heart is by saying three words - You lost weight.
Girl says to her Blonde friend, I slept with a Brazilian man last night. The Blonde replies: OMG you SLUT! How many is a Brazilian??
Roses are red, so is my wine. Refill my glass and I`ll be just fine.
When I see someone yawn, I yawn. I wish it was the same with exercising....
Today I saw a girl with the word "Anel" on her butt. I was like, woah..it`s supposed to say "Anal"..it`s spelled wrong then I realized it was supposed to say "Angel". The G was stuck in her a$$crack
COLLEGE STUDENTS: if you`re looking for a job, your career center lists thousands of openings you don`t have enough experience for.