Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
The face jewelry is getting out of hand. I saw a guy today that looked like he had done a face plant in a tackle box.
I am so deep in the friendzone I have been introduced to her boyfriend`s parents.
Delete cookies? Why on Earth would I want to do that?! I LOVE COOKIES
Sometimes Google should just come back with a message that says "trust me, you don`t want to know."
What do sleeping and sex have in common? ... I`m not getting nearly enough of either.
"This place needs to be sticky, wall to wall." - Every 2 year old with a Popsicle.
Don`t tell me I have to say "Happy Holidays" so nobody gets offended. I will "Merry Christmas" the sh!t out of you.
It`s weird how we are all here because of boners
I`ve come to believe that everyone on Earth could benefit from a 12 step program.
This bald spot just appeared out of thin hair.
Iām sorry I offended you with my common sense.
Stop procrastinating. Join Hokey Pokey Anonymous today and turn that life around!
I think my TV remote has developed some sort of Romulan cloaking technology.
People who over-exaggerate make me so mad that I just want to light everyone on fire.
My desire to be well informed is currently in deep conflict with my need to stay sane.