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I would like to think that I`ll die heroic death saving someone`s life but it`s more likely I`ll trip over my shoelaces and choke on a spoonful of Nutella.
I`m at my most relaxed around dogs and prescription drugs.
I wish you could order Karma like flowers and have it delivered.
Separating the men from the boys, one mood swing at a time.
You`d think my neighbors could have the decency to ignore me back.
You know it`s way past your bed time when the 1-800-dial-a-hoe commercials come on.
“Shh.. Do you hear that?” “What? I heard nothing.” “Exactly, it’s the sound of no one caring.”
Theirye’re, problem solved.
Is it "poon tang", or "poontang"? I`m trying to update my Christian Mingle profile.
Why do we only crave what`s bad for us? Alcohol, deep fried food, cake... You never hear anyone say "I`d kill for some salad."
Since it is the day to give thanks, I would like to say once again...you`re welcome.
I like it here because not only do I get to air out my dirty laundry, I get to see yours too.
Friends would describe me as classy, sassy and a bit smart-assy.
is it rude to throw a breath-mint in someone`s mouth while they are talking?
A stress ball, made of concrete, and to throw at the person who`s stressing you out.