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Every time I use a public bathroom, I always wonder why so many people have Sharpies on them at all times.
Million dollar idea: Pills that you can take with alcohol.
I`m glad people are exercising but I want to see cooler activities posted on FB. Like "I spent 1 hour wrestling a bear. 110 calories burned."
There were only 3 commandments until Moses’ wife got involved.
I drank an energy drink so if anyone needs help packing, pushing your car to a gas station or shaking the leaves off a tree
Of course I`m a good mother ... They`re still alive aren`t they.
The people naming dinosaurs should teach the people naming hurricanes how to name stuff.
is having one of those days where they feels like lighting someones face on fire and then trying to put it out with a fork
I sent that "Ancestry " site some information on my family tree. They sent me back a packet of seeds and suggested that I just start over
It`s not you, it`s me. I just don`t like myself when I`m around you.
I know right from wrong. Wrong is the fun one.
I see subway employees are still having their "how much lettuce can you fit on a sandwich" contest.
I dunno who decided on the spelling of bologna, but it`s obvious he had no idea how letters work.
Don`t call me names, you don`t know enough words to describe me
I was asked what I would give the woman who has everything? Well…my phone number for a start.