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Ladys have it easy, if they ever do start to loose an argument they can just start playing with their boobs
You’d think “attractive neighbor leaves curtains open” would appear in more real estate listings.
People who think I’m not a religious person should see me when the airplane starts to shake.
You learn something new everyday and if you didnt know that then you just did.
Girl: What color are my eyes? Guy: 34C
Some people, even in photos, just look like they smell horrible.
OMG! A CUSTOMER ALMOST DIED IN FRONT OF ME TODAY!! But then I counted to 10 and put the scissors back in the drawer. She never even knew.
The only way I want to see your ultrasound picture is if you`re having a velociraptor.
Awkward moment when you don’t know if you were offered gum out of generosity or if your breath stinks.
It’s pretty scary that before facebook… All these thoughts and stuff just stayed in peoples heads.
The only thing I drink from a shot glass nowdays is Maalox.
The Teen Choice Awards air last tonight if you want to see a great reminder of why kids aren`t allowed to vote.
Porn & love songs. Destroying reality forever.
Before you have any hope for the future of humanity, come and look at how this guy parked.
Some of you need to be driven out to the country and released back into the wild