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Is it wrong to tell a knock knock joke to a homeless person ?
I´m playing that game where the floor is made of lava, so I obviously can´t get off the couch or I´ll die.
If u cant live without me, why aren`t you dead yet.
Girls probably spend more time thinking about what men think than men actually spend thinking.
Wouldn`t it be awesome if MTV had a show called "16 and Applying to Colleges"
I`d say that 6:30 is the best clock time, hands down.
I DON`T NEED ANYONE OR ANYTHING!!! (Except for Louie...the name I`ve given this meatball sub.)
Whenever someone asks me to sign their cast, I always like to write: "Last warning, you have a week to get the rest of the money together."
No one`s going to do it for you. It`s up to you, to make naps a priority in your life.
You’re lucky that I’m so terrified of prison.
awkward moment when the dentist is talking to you with his hands on your mouth
Being normal is boring.
I was chasing my dreams, but I tripped over reality and busted my head on the truth.
If you want to keep a secret from me, write it down and send it to me as a Facebook event invitation.
If you fall, I`ll be there - Floor