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No matter what the product, a good way to throw off an aggressive salesman is to interrupt him and ask, β€œYes, but does it work on cats?”
It`s weird how in England the passenger drives the car
All I`m saying is why blame it on being lazy when you can blame it on being old...
When you’re old, my kids will be in charge. I’m so, so sorry.
To everybody that is single don`t worry you will have your day............ Palm Sunday is just around the corner
Secretly replaced the bacon with beggin` strips. Let`s see if the customers notice.
If someone asks for advice, just tell em to follow their heart. No idea what that sh!t means but at least they`re not talking to you anymore
You really are the cat`s pajamas, and by that I mean you`re a stupid idea.
Did you know dryer sheets double as toilet paper and leave your a$$ smelling like meadows and rain drops?
I`d stop disappointing you, if you stopped expecting me to do stuff.
I just spent a lot of time trying to form a thought when it would`ve been easier to just say, "F*ck it."
I don`t know what your problem is, but I`ll bet it`s hard to pronounce.
Not to get technical, but according to chemistry, alcohol is a solution.
Subway only exists because we`re all too damn lazy to throw a sandwich together. "Could you lay meat on that bread for me? Here`s $8."
I can`t believe these women are just walking around with yoga mats like a game of yoga might just break out at any moment