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I miss being able to use the excuse "I wasn`t home when you called."
Finally got my Bon Jovi Sat Nav working... Wooahh we`re half way there.
I always take a number at the deli, and I`ve been keeping them.... Eventually I`ll have all the numbers and it will always be my turn.
If you ever want to watch a women feel herself up for ten minutes, hide her cellphone.
There are a thousand better ways to spend your time and yet here you are with me.
Parts of a worm: 1) Worm
Dear who ever’s reading this, I could be naked right now and you would never know.
I`m not lazy. I`m just highly motivated to not do anything.
If a single teacher can’t teach all the subjects then how could you expect a single student to learn all subjects.
Am I the only one who thinks water has that taste that no one can describe?
Ironing boards are just surf boards that gave up their dreams and got real jobs.
Just saw a car at McDonalds take 4 tries to get lined up in a parking space. I`m not judgmental, so I won`t assume what sex she was.
The first guy who made fire by rubbing two sticks together probably did a lot of other weird sh!t.
The “Slow Children Playing” signs always make me sad. Would it cost that much more to thrown in punctuation?
Remember when mowhawks meant you were a tough punk rocker? Now they just mean that you`re 3 and your parents are idiots.