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SINGLE GUYS: Nervous about flirting with a woman? Just remember: they`re smart, confident, and aware they don`t need us, so yeah, you should be worried.
is on a Mission. The magic leprechaun told me to follow the pink racehorse to the rainbow where the orange elephant is holding my skittles hostage
Love your neighbor ... but don`t get caught.
How to break up with someone: You: Your ex is attractive. Partner: Which one? You: ME. You: BYEEEE
I`m not insulting you, I`m describing you.
Let`s lay in bed all day & trade sexual favors for trips to the fridge
If you think your wife is crazy now. Wait untill you divorce her.
went to vegas: put a coin in the machine and a prize came out, put another coin and another prize came out...problem is i don`t know what to do with all these empty cans now.
Remember…it’s only embarrassing if you care what people think.
Its amazing how many people respond to "Hey Dumba$$!"
So can we just skip to summer now?
If you love someone, let them go, if they don`t come back..... Set them on fire *evil grin*
Still haven`t cashed in my winning megamillions ticket...scared the $6 will make my friends treat me different.
Yes, I streaked once on a dare ... all the rest of the times though were just for fun
Not to brag,,,, but legally,,, before something can be labeled "Idiot Proof",,, they have to run it by ME.