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"F@ck It" has gotten me through a lot of situations.
DUI attorneys should buy some ad space on those Taco Bell hot sauce packets.
I want a doorbell that makes the sound of someone knocking on the door.
I enjoy being the black sheep of the family ... Black sheep are the prettiest & don`t show as much dirt as the white ones.
All the coffee in Colombia couldn`t make me a morning person.
Do you know how many poisonous apples I`d have to give out before I was considered to be the fairest in the land?
With all the potato chip flavors available now, I see no point in buying actual food...
So I was thinking... since the kids get the Easter bunny, why shouldn`t I expect a visit from a Playboy bunny today?
Some mornings it`s best just to fill the sink with coffee, dunk you head in, and suck.
Time to get out of bed and worry from another location.
Don’t be ashamed of who you are. That’s your parents job.
Is everything expensive or am I simply poor?
If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, does it really have calories?
Naked and Afraid also describes the last time I spent a night at a Holiday Inn
United Airlines was just voted number one in Chinese takeout!