Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
What´s the difference between light and hard? You can go to bed with a light on.
How do I tell my boss I don`t want to do work anymore but still want money.
I`m definitely the drunkest person in this ball pit.
I don’t just say crazy things on the internet, I do that in real life too.
Maybe my goal was to be a 35 year old loser on the Internet ... You don`t know.
I will always love you, even if I have to from no closer than 300 feet.
Today is "National Take Your Flask To Work Day." ... I just made it up. Tell the others.
I don`t know why people say life is short....this seems to be taking forever.
I`m just a boy...standing in front of a girl...asking her to lov.....aw who am I trying to fool. I just want in your pants.
What if Oxygen makes our voice really deep…. And Helium just brings it back to normal?
There would be a lot less people willing to run for public office if the losers were required to pick up all the lawn signs afterwards.
I`m reaching the point where I really hope it`s not possible to be annoyed to death.
keep scrolling I`ve got nothing....
My son wants to be a shrink when he grows up... Clearly I`ve failed to teach him our family`s place in the psychiatric process...
I don’t know how your day is going, but I just got lucky on the couch! Yep, I found a dollar!