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I made a bucket list for when I kick the bucket. Number one: Wear shoes! Ever tried kicking a metal bucket without shoes? Hurt like hell.
Who the hell is Pete, and why do we do things for his sake?
Amazon’s recommendations are like that friend who heard you say “ninja” once and then got you ninja stuff for your birthday every year for twenty years
Every time I see a safety warning on a product I can`t help think to myself how natural selection has failed us once again...
Here Friday Friday...come on...hurry up! Oh no you don`t! You come when I call you damn it! Get your a$$ over here. ... good boy!
My bank balance is a constant reminder that I`m safe from identity theft
Excuse me but which level of Hell is this?
For those of you who know nothing about pleasing a woman... the G spot is located at the end of the word "shopping".....js
As i get older i realize I do a LOT more YOGA...attempting to tie my shoelaces
Well, I`m going to take a hot shower. Its like a regular shower, but with me in it.
If you get excited that jumping on the bed won`t spill the wineglass on the other side, you`re probably an alcoholic.
Hell hath no fury like a hungry me.
To hell with the "dislike" button! i think we need a "who cares" button, a "WTF" button and a "STFU!" button. just saying.... Oh and a "lol" button because i just get tired of writing it! lol!
I`m so, so sorry I started the whole Facebook Is Going To Start Charging thing. I didn`t think it would go THIS far..... sorry
How`d this get posted?