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If you watched a person cut a piece of wood, would that be sawed or seen?
I wonder how seaworld would react if I walked in there with a fishing pole....
Warranty – A notice telling the buyer when the product that was just purchased will no longer function.
Whoever invented self checkout greatly overestimated the general intelligence of the human race.
I’m exhausted just thinking of everything I have to do.
I would die if I had to stop exaggerating.
Don’t ask a girl where she wants to eat. Tell her to guess where you’re taking her to eat. Then take her to her first guess.
Hey dumb a$$. Not everything I post pertains to you. Just the stuff that starts with Hey dumb a$$.
My dog acts like her entire family was murdered by a vacuum cleaner.
This century is already 15% over.
Reckon the first person to make popcorn by accident probably ran away
Don`t sell yourself short, in fact, don`t sell yourself at all. I`m pretty sure it`s illegal
Is it physically possible to be sad in rollerskates? Cause I think my cat`s just being dramatic.
It is impossible to look cool while holding onto a leash attached to a dog who is taking a crap.
I think a clear conscience is really just memory loss