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I am creating the first ever "flavored windows". They should make some of you very happy.
Please don`t wear skinny jeans if you don`t have skinny genes.
For those who do not know what ADHD can do to a person, let me expla.....oooh look i got a text message.
Can`t wait `til I`m old enough to pretend I can`t hear.
"It`s not a pyramid scheme" is a phrase almost exclusively used by people involved in pyramid schemes
Million dollar idea: A bathroom mirror that takes pictures.
The only thing I hate worse than holding a girl`s purse is when it doesn`t match what I`m wearing.
I just found out it takes 5 sheep to make 1 wool sweater. I didn`t even know they knew how to knit.
My right thumb is in the best shape of my life.
I wish I could commute by roller coaster.
If you touch your phone in the right places, a pizza will arrive at your door.
My favorite part of the Bible is when God gives humans free will, then kills them with a flood because they didn`t act the way he wanted.
You’d be more impressed with me if you never met anyone else.
Do you women realize how silly you all look with your clothes on?
If you boil a clown, do you get laughing stock?