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I got on-line to check the weather...That was 12 years ago.
I would watch NASCAR if hot wheels designed the tracks.
You know how people dread going to the dentist? I feel that way about getting out of bed.
This dishwasher sucks. It`s already ruined three of my paper plates.
sorry but your password must contain an "uppercase letter, a number, a haiku, a gang sign, a hieroglyph, and the blood of a virgin"
Iām considering becoming a mind reader ... What are your thoughts?
Not sure what to do with all the daylight we are saving.
This patience thing takes forever.
Day six of my push-up challenge. So far, I`ve eaten 107 push-up pops.
What I lack in sex appeal I make up in staying home and drinking.
Whatever you do in life, always give 100%...unless you`re donating blood...
Remember when people had diaries & got mad when someone read them? Now they put everything online and get mad when people don`t
Whenever you feel nobody cares or loves you. You should ask yourself...Am I TOO sexy?
How easily you`re offended is directly proportional to how dumb you are.
ATMs should have built in breathalyzers. I would save so much money.