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Anyone who says sunshine brings happiness has never danced in the rain.
The symptoms of Ebola are sweating, weakness, diarrhoea and stomach pains. Kind of like when I see my wife going thru my phone.
Spent the morning at the farmers market carefully selecting fruits and vegetables to throw away next Saturday.
I see you liked my status... I accept your invitation for sex.
If noone comes from the future to stop you, how bad of a decision could it really be?
I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken.
HANGOVER!!!!! it`s God`s way of sayin "u kicked a$$ last night"
Pretending I`m a pleasent person all day is exhausting.
I don`t understand when people say `age is just a number`... Age is clearly a word.
Word for today: Dipshidiot
Don’t expect a “bless you” after the 4th sneeze…get your self together
I now have more electronic screens in my life than friends.
How dumb is that family if Mrs. Doubtfire can fool them a second time?
How`d this get posted?
I hope daylight savings time hasn`t thrown you off your schedule of doing nothing.