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The guy that discovered milk...What was he doing to that cow?
I’ve had no formal martial arts training, but I know for a fact the Power Rangers are wasting too much energy on unnecessary summersaults
is admitting to pushing Humpty Dumpty, he had it coming!!
If the shampoo and conditioner in her shower are not the same brand GET THE F*CK OUT, SHE`S A MAN!
I used to date a magazine editor. But, I broke up with her because she just had too many issues. No YOU shut up!
My mother said, “You won’t amount to anything because you procrastinate.” I said, “Oh ya…..Just you wait.....”
If you don`t remember her name in the morning, take her to Starbucks.
Actually, when I went to New Orleans, I blacked out too.
Whoever invented grass must be a billionaire that stuff is everywhere
If you added up all the time you waste on Facebook, think how much TV you could watch.
I just heard someone say "I can`t wait for 13/13/13" .....let`s take a moment and pray for this dumbass
The parents with the ugliest babies take and post the most pictures.
I haven`t seen any new Bigfoot pictures in a while... I hope he`s OK.
Nothing says " My divorce didn`t go as planned " quite like the guy with grocery bags hanging on the sides of his bicycles handlebars
Hold on I`m about to count my money. Alright I`m done.