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I think the cats are hording all the single women out there...
Nothing is more dangerous than a woman β€œgathering her thoughts”.
I`m all over that like a fat kid on a Smarty
Share this if you are weird and don`t care
My wife has a thing for bringing injured animals home... I think she should just stop driving.
Why does everybody call it a "hot water heater?" It`s really a cold water heater.
Despite the high cost of living, it still remains popular.
If your wife asks you if you know where the broom is, it`s not a good idea to ask her if she is going somewhere.
There should be an observation deck at Walmart.
I could write an entire book on excuses,,, but I have to pick my grandma up at the airport.
I saw my ex girlfriend broken down with two flat tires this morning which made me late for work... Nine times I drove past before she noticed me laughing at her.
Family and Friends - I am FAR too busy to listen to any of your problems or concerns *Googles do penguins go to heaven?*
If I had a time machine, I`d just keep going back every 8-9 hours so I could sleep more.
"it`s the thought that counts" doesn`t include showering. You have to actually do that.
I keep my land line so I can find my cell phone.