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Have you hugged you bartender today.
When we are small, our mom`s would use really small forks as spoons to feed us...But what about Chinese moms? Would they use toothpicks?
Are you watching too much T.V but not doing enough reading? Turn your subtitles on.
The part of “no” that I don’t understand is the part where I don’t get what I want.
There are two types of people in the world: 1. People who understand and appreciate sarcasm. 2. Morons.
I want to start a womans magazine called "Period". ..then every few months I`ll send it out late JUST to freak them out. ;)
I have a life outside of internet, it involves charging my phone.
Drunk people are the only honest ones left.
You can`t always control who walks in to your life but you can control which window to throw them out.
A house is not a home until you can find all light switches in the dark.
Peppermint Schnapps, the mouthwash you can swallow
If she is still able to walk to the kitchen after s@x , you don`t deserve a sandwich.
The best things in life can`t be seen or touched....well, at least that`s what the restraining order says.
Some days the problem is I care too much… Today was not one of those days…
I wonder if Brazil has a wax museum?