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I’m classically trained in the art of Nintendo.
You know you`re old when you think "pokemon" is a gay rastafarian
If people don`t occasionally walk away from you shaking their heads, you`re doing something wrong.
Is beer cheaper on cyber monday?
watching porn is like finding happiness in other enjoyment.....
I spend more time looking in the fridge than I actually do eating.
My girlfriend wants to get married. I hope she finds someone nice.
Tonight`s weather forecast: dark. Continued dark overnight with widely scattered of light by morning.
I might not be smarter than a 5th grader, but I can buy beer.
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
Ladies first. Because it might be dangerous.
12 year olds having sex ? Im sorry when i was 12 i was to afraid to pull my foreskin back incase my d*ck fell out.
You mean to tell me people run? On purpose? When nobody is chasing them?
Me in a shopping mall: "I like that stuff" *looks at pricetag* "i don`t like it anymore"
Money isn´t everything but it sure keeps you in touch with your children.