Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
People hate the truth. Luckily, the Truth doesn`t give a $#!t.
"Rear facing, pedal activated photon cannon" sounds much more badass than "brake lights"
Just bought a Ken doll. I don`t know what everyone`s talking about, you can`t read books on this thing.
If there`s one thing I`ve learned hiking, it`s the early bird gets the face full of spider webs
Let’s all take a moment and be thankful spiders can’t fly.
Whoever figured out the `days of the month correspond with your knuckles` thing had too much time on their hands
I bet now a lot of doctors are going to be reluctant to respond to “Is there a doctor on the plane?”
If history has taught us anything, it’s that reheated french fries are gross.
When you are dead, you don’t know you are dead but other people do. The same applies when you are stupid.
Sometimes entire relationships can only be described as “that weird thing I did for a while.”
I need a fixed income. Mine is broken.
Word of the day is bishop: My aunt fell down the stairs and I had to pick the bishop.
After Monday and Tuesday... even the week says WTF!
Ive been invited to farmville! Now what to wear...
Dear Lord, Thanks for making me funny. Especially since you didn`t give me much else to work with.