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People will do odd things to get even.
I think the cats are hording all the single women out there...
The Bible is pretty accurate...Especially when thrown at close range.
Snoring is just God`s way of ensuring women hate their husbands while they sleep too.
I wonder if more children were conceived because of alcohol or more alcohol was consumed because of children.
Not to brag, but I can spend hours coming up with reasons not to do something that takes 5 minutes.
My birthday is coming up. I dont like to think of it as getting older I like to think of it as experience points.
I poured some shampoo over my speakers today and they blew up... So much for EXTRA VOLUME.
I wish I could veto MY bills.
One thing I`ll never understand is alcohol free wine
Sometimes the smartest thing you can do is play dumb.
I`m done with tucking in shirts. Too many people complaining I`m invading their "personal space." LOL
I really don`t know what the big deal is about Black Friday. I black out every Friday....
I’m going to be very busy in the afterlife. the list of people I’m going to haunt grows everyday.
Aaron Hernandez`s next jersey is going to be a jailhouse jumpsuit!