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Today I gave up procrastination for Lent.
I put the pro in inappropriate.
At what point does the dentist stop giving you toothbrushes? Dude, Iām forty. I have one.
Not every flower can say love, but a rose did. Not every plant can survive thirst, but a cactus did. Not every dummy can read, but look at you go...
I believe in love at first episode.
If I agree with you, we would both be wrong.
Iām mad, but not as mad as someone asking to see the rules in the middle of a monopoly game.
I`ve never said "in all seriousness" and actually meant it.
Jodi Arias dating O J Simpson now that would be a hell of a relationship
Once in a while, someone amazing will come into your life. And here I am!
Why does it have to be bacon OR sausage?
Iām not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them
You know it`s been a good night when you wake up and see bite marks on the walls...
If everyone would just be naughty next year, Santa would bring us all coal ... energy crisis solved!
Snails would be terrifying if they moved quickly.