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The meek shall inherit the earth. Probably because they`re the only ones who won`t complain about what we`ve done to it.
I bet Waldo`s parents are worried sick.
Pandas are proof that if you have a cute enough outfit no one will call you fat.
I watched Americas Got Talent for 15 minutes and I beg to differ.
Great idea for an April Fools Prank ... Hide all of the desktop icons on someone`s computer and replace their wallpaper with a screenshot of their old desktop.
If McDonald`s was smart they`d serve breakfast until 2pm on the weekends.
If I`m not back in ten minutes ... then just wait longer.
I`ll make better mistakes tomorrow.
Clearly, you are a person with an open mind. I can feel the breeze from here.
When grown-ups tell kids they have a lot of energy, they really mean that they’re being annoying little bastards.
Threw my back out today reaching for the shampoo in the shower. But I`ll be telling everyone it`s from having sex while skydiving.
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
We all make mistakes .... I just do it better than everyone else.
If I had a British accent, I`d never shut up.
You never outgrow sleepovers, they just become coed.