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Hey, somebody get ready to wake up the guy in Green Day.
No matter how old you are ... swingsets are cool.
I wish relationships were more like cell phone plans - "Free nights and weekends."
Whenever there is an awkward silence try whispering, "Did you forget your line?"
Cheers, to judging people who spell words wrong in their statuses.
My mom just walked in and called me gay... If my nails weren`t drying i swear to God..
I laughed more at the Broncos offense then I did at the commercials.
I`m just saying it might be a good idea for Liam Neeson`s to take his family members to the vet and get them microchipped.
Don´t be stupid, it´s not smart.
If you love someone, let them go, if they don`t come back..... Set them on fire *evil grin*
I`m a fantastic secret-keeper because, deep down, I really don`t care enough to actually talk about it to anyone else.
I got kicked out of the audience of "Cats" on Broadway for bringing a laser pointer.
It would serve me better if they put shopping carts in the middle of the store where my pride realizes I have too much sh!t to carry.
I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell. :)
Today is boozeday, I mean Tuesday...same difference!