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Why don’t we just take the safety labels off of everything and let this stupidity problem solve itself?
Are you bored? Head over to Walmart, go into a fitting room, shut the door, wait awhile, and then yell very loudly, `Hey! There`s no toilet paper in here.`
if the shoe fits wear it , if it too tight take it off
My girlfriend says I shouldn`t plan things so far in advance. Well, she`s not my girlfriend yet.
"That wasn`t chicken in the Chow Mein" I`d make a great Fortune Cookie writer.
How many HA’s equal a LOL? How about a LMAO? Is there a conversion chart somewhere?
Time to turn over a new leaf ... With my luck it’ll be poison ivy.
When you turn 21, you can legally do all the things you`ve been doing since you were 15.
This beer is making me awesome !! ;)
Why isn’t the default for online shopping “view all”? Who likes to skip through 20 pages of only 12 items…
I would be a terrible stalker because A) I`m not motivated enough B) You would always hear the rattle of peanut m&ms behind you.
Don`t text me while I`m texting you. Now I have to go back and change my text.
My 5 year old still has so much to learn. I asked him for a screwdriver and he brought me some sort of tool.
The only difference between McDonald`s and my work is McDonald`s has only got one clown running the show.
Stop undressing me with your eyes!...Use your teeth!