Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Behind every successful student, there is a deactivated Facebook account.
I get you, anti-evolution people. I`m too lazy to learn science too.
Remember, pretty much all of the “tough guys” you see on TV and movies were theater majors in college.
Mothers never really understand the irony of calling their children "come here you son of a bitch"
Holding up score cards during sex is not acceptable, apparently.
Who needs Halloween decorations when I can just put up my selfies?
I don`t know if my stomach is growling cuz I`m hungry or if that`s my liver crying cuz it`s the weekend.
Guys, if a girl invites you upstairs for "coffee," first make sure she has coffee, you don`t want to get up there and there`s no coffee.
Some days are better than others. And those days always involve alcohol.
I swear I can hear Google sigh every time I start typing in their search bar.
Do you know what I hate worse than people? Groups of people.
From now on when I accept a friend request I`ll just write on their wall: You belong to me now.
Apparently “finders keepers” does not include expensive cars in parking lots.
Women say childbirth is the most painful thing... obviously they have never stepped on a Lego.
I love in horror movies how the person yells out "hello?!" as if the killer is gonna say "yeah I´m in the kitchen, want a sandwich?"