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I FINALLY "friended" my girlfriend on Facebook.. You know.. So I could get updates on our relationship status.. :|
Hi I’m a spider & I can make your girlfriend scream louder than you can.
Last night my wife said to me, “What would you do without me?” Apparently, “Your sister” was the wrong answer.
If you never jumped from couch to couch as kid to avoid the lava, then you missed out on childhood.
Sometimes I wonder if that kid in the Dreamworks logo has caught the fish yet.
I always thought a chickpea was just when girls go to the bathroom in groups.
I’ve noticed the less open-minded someone is, the more open-mouthed they tend to be.
I sent that "Ancestry " site some information on my family tree. They sent me back a packet of seeds and suggested that I just start over
People who go rock climbing: you know you don`t have to, right
Tried cleaning the house to the A-Team theme and ended up building a tank. So close.
These Days everything is really starting to Click!.......My knee`s, my elbows, and the rest of my joints!
A piñata is NOT a good idea for a Halloween costume.
Admit it, we all have that special someone we`d visit if given a tank to drive for a day
Going through the dealership lot with the salesman, pointing at every car and asking, "what kinda robot does that one turn into?"
All I want is a little more than I’ll ever get.