Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Hair pulling during sex is hot ... unless the whole wig comes off.
If Plan A doesn’t work, the alphabet has 25 more letters. Keep calm.
Yes I have a dirty mind ... And you`re on it!
Being a fat guy at McDonald`s is like being the muscle guy at the gym. People stay out of your way cause they know you mean business
Do you ever get that feeling that you are being watched? Because if it is bothering you, I can stop.
You’re the reason I wake up everyday... Just kidding I have a job!!
I replaced the spare tire in my car with a box of wine. I`ve no idea how to change a tire, & I bet I`ll need a drink as I wait for a ride.
The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage.
Pool party at my house, bring ur own pool..
This post is just for you.
You just dont know how dumb you are until you get a little smarter
I love this oscillating fan, 5 out of every 15 seconds.
The fact that Pitbul is even considered a musician is more disgusting than the fact that toothpaste was invented years after french kissing was.
I may not be the smartest guy in the world, or the richest guy in the world, or the best looking guy in the world, but.... Oh, hell. Now I`m depressed.
You wanna know where I`m ticklish? Hawaii.