Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I am creating the first ever "flavored windows". They should make some of you very happy.
I find it most unfair that the dentist in this neighborhood hands out toothbrushes for Halloween but the pharmacist doesn`t hand out drugs.
My favorite Facebook photo of your baby is easily #28,614
sometimes i look at people and think really, thats the sperm that won.
Lady`s if you want guys to look at your face instead of your chest ... eat a banana.
"Grapey." -me after every wine at the wine-tasting
Make fun of George Bush all you want, but he would have found a way to bomb North Korea before they shut down Hollywood.
How does Ice-T order an Iced Tea without sounding like a douche?
Vegetarian is an old Native American word for bad hunter.
My neighbour has diabetes and now she won`t make me cupcakes anymore, its like bad things always happen to me.
Really don`t see the need for pants for the rest of this day. :)
next time you`re at a movie point at the screen when a scene with extras are on and say to your buddy "look, there i am!" and see how many people look over at you in awe.
“Dad, I’m hungry.” “Hi, Hungry. I’m Dad.” - Every time.
I wish I was as skinny as I was the first time I thought I was fat.
The majority of life`s greatest lessons are learned while observing your drunk friends.