Daily Silly Status

I end a sentence with "just sayin" because ending it with "dumbass" would be offensive.

Stress from children can take 10 yrs off your life Drinking alcohol from stress can take another 10 yrs Based on my math, I died 5 yrs ago

You win some, you lose some, and if you`re lucky, you get some.

I`d like to have a kid but I`m not sure I`m ready to spend ten years of my life constantly asking someone where their shoes are.

Coffee: So I can do nothing with more energy.

F*ck spiders. F*ck them and the way they move their legs, f*ck their ability to multiply by the million and f*ck their eight, beady little black eyes that offer unblinking, soulless glimpses of the blackest depths of hell itself.

I don’t appreciate the 5 minute radio ads about how commercial-free the station is.

Sometimes people come into your life and they need to stop doing that

Life is simple. Eat. Sleep. Update Facebook status.

I was blown away when I realised the word " OK " is a side ways person.

Let`s drink till this day makes some sort of sense.

You`re in your 20`s... you don`t have "haters"... you have "adults" that think you are "annoying"

I thought `Pokemon` was a Jamaican Porn... My bad...

Stop picking on Justin Bieber. That`s somebody`s daughter.

Boss: "Are you texting?" Me: "No, I`m Tweeting." Boss: "What`s the difference?" Me: "Texting would imply that I have friends."