Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
And then her mood ring just...exploded
I could really go for a beer and a million dollars.
I wonder if one day somebody will knock on my door and say to me, “Hey ,we have 7 mutual friends in Facebook; may I come in?"
Women can brutally and methodically destroy your life. But they let you see their tits along the way so it`s totally cool.
Yes we`re friends on facebook but that`s where it ends, stop trying to talk to me in real life... mom
I just decorated my bedroom to look like my desk at work so I can fall sleep faster.
Very few things upset my wife. So, it makes me feel rather special to be one of them.
I don`t understand fat homeless people. What are you eating? Broken hopes and dreams?
Turbo Tax might just be the worst video game I`ve ever played.
I asked him about his weekend, but apparently what happens in vagueness, stays in vagueness.
Man cannot live on bread alone ... hence beer and stuff.
This woman just stared at the beer in my cup holder, like she`s never seen a cup holder on a grocery cart before.
I don`t get nearly enough credit for managing not to be a violent psychopath
After Monday and Tuesday... even the week says WTF!
Just saw the previews for the movie Taken 3, you would think by now he would`ve gave his daughter self-defense and gun lessons?