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I just had a conversation with my-self...but it just turned into an argument. I think it`s that time of the month...
World Cup Soccer? If I wanted to watch someone struggle to score for 90 minutes, I`d go watch some of my single friends at the bar.
OH NO !,,,,,,,,, I just realized I can`t stop calling the addiction hotline....
I didn`t want to grow up; I just wanted to be able to reach the cookies.
That awkward moment, when you wake up with one sock on.
I don`t think boredom gets enough blame for the trouble it causes.
If your phone doesn´t ring it´s me.
It`s so hard being a single mom when you have no kids and are a male teenager.
How did anybody express anger before the invention of the caps lock key?
My wife woke up with a HUGE smile on her face this morning. I love sharpies.
never tell a lie...unless it is true
Lately I`ve been convinced that some people were born solely for purpose of eventually pissing me off...
After a night of heavily drinkin` there`s one thing I can`t stand...and that`s up.
Why isn`t Wendy`s girl fat? You would think that someone who eats so many Baconators, chicken sandwiches and other burgers, would be quite the porker by now.
If stress burned calories, I’d be a super model.