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I noticed the toilet roll incorrectly installed in your selfie.
You health nuts are gonna feel real stupid when you`re laying in the hospital dying of nothing.
I`d hate to be a dragon .....I`d get so pissed tryin to blow out my birthday candles.
I might be a day late and a dollar short, but it is still my personal best.
I have no problem giving credit when credit is due. It’s giving payment when payment is due that I seem to struggle with.
Do these `Skinny Jeans` make my blood circulation look more than purple or less than purple?
Please don’t take anything I say personal or too seriously. I’m just an idiot with internet access.
FB friends, no one gives a ratsass what concerts you went to...
Am I getting older or is the supermarket starting to play some great songs?
I liked you a lot more before I met you.
I`m beginning to think they invented the wireless mouse just so there was one less thing to use to hang yourself with at work.
everyone is BEAUTIFUL in there own way--your just to UGLY to see that
Think we could get the North Korean hackers to end "Keeping Up With The Kardashians"?
If they were really trying to prepare high school kids for “real life” they would offer a class called “working with a$$holes”
Losing weight is not working for me, so I`m concentrating on getting taller.