Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I swear, watching people at a 4-way stop sign is like watching `Night at the Roxbury.` "Him? Me? Oh Me? Me or Him?"
Toilets are really just fart amplifiers when you are trying to be quiet.
"She really does suck!" could be a complement in the porn industry
If its the thought that counts, then I`ve banged so many hot chicks.
I`m a little stumped by this beer to pee volume ratio.
Objects in spandex are larger than they appear
You’d be amazed how often I’m wrong when people say guess what.
Next time you fill out a job application and it asks about military service, it is best not to mention that you`ve gone Commando a few times in your life.
Fast way to mess up someones Knock Knock joke? "It`s open."
Facebook: The only place where you get excited when strangers follow you.
They`ve been farting with my facebook again. It`s like the old days when the the girl you woke up with wasn`t the one you went to bed with.
Rabbits jump & they live for 8 yrs. Dogs run & they live for 15 yrs. Turtles don’t do anything & they live for 150 years. LESSON LEARNED!
All this time I thought Bi-Polar was big white bear with no sexual preference.
COLLEGE STUDENTS: if you`re looking for a job, your career center lists thousands of openings you don`t have enough experience for.
Every store should have one line for people who have their sh!t together.