Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I wonder what "don`t touch" is in Braille.
Long story short, I love summaries.
HA! If you think I`M crazy you should meet ME!
Is it too early for extra nog in my egg?
Before meeting a hot chick, wish I could talk to the dude who`s sick of her bullsh!t.
If McDonald`s was smart they`d serve breakfast until 2pm on the weekends.
My GPS is basically just one more woman in my life who I turn on and then ignore.
I dont know whats more awkward, answering Dora, or sitting in silence while she stares at you.
If I could have anything in the world it would be to have the same finger prints as my enemy
I gave up my Ego, because I am so much better than that..................
LSD makes users lose weight` That makes sense, it`s kinda hard to get to the fridge when there`s a dragon guarding it.
The nice thing about being a guy is your underwear only costs $10 for a 3-pack.
If my memory gets any worse I`ll be able to plan my own surprise party.
You`re in your 20`s... you don`t have "haters"... you have "adults" that think you are "annoying"
Hey, people who don`t drive *exactly* like I do. Get off the road!