😄 Daily Silly Status
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is about to stick a pin in your voodoo doll... brace yourself.
I`m so scattered I don`t know whether I found this rope or lost my horse.
Tomorrow, I`m going to open up the time capsule I buried when I was a kid. I can`t wait to see how big my puppy got!
"Just so you know, you`re coming home with me tonight." I whisper to all the leftover food on the table from our dinner date.
Go ahead, judge me. Wait, let me get my bat first. Alright, I`m ready now.
Lower your expectations and I will totally amaze you.
I just sent out my daily text to a random number saying "I hit Zack with my truck. I`m going to need to use your hacksaw to cut him up.
The mailman just delivered an 8-track of Boz Skaggs Greatest Hits. I guess this fulfills my Columbia House obligation.
If I owned a copy shop, I’d only hire identical twins to work there.
Pretending I`m a pleasent person all day is exhausting
Don’t let anybody push you around ... unless you’re in a wagon, cuz that is just plain fun.
Breasts are like model trains. They were originally meant for children but grown men always want to play with them.
How I talk: 25% swearing, 25% sarcasm 50% a combination of both.
I went by the Gym today. Its the third time this week............. One of these day`s I might actually go in.
I wanna lie on the floor and not think for a month or two.