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I`d say I`m not a morning person but I`m really not sure I`m an evening person either.
Guests are coming over for Thanksgiving... Almost time to booby trap the medicine cabinet with marbles.
Head & Shoulders needs to come out with a body spray that will help repel flakey people from my life.
McDonald’s Management Rule #23: “The employee with the most severe accent or speech impediment must work the drive-thru at all times.”
There is no greater stress than the stress of a guy who forgot his phone & left it at home with his wife.
I opened a bottle of wine to let it breathe. It didn`t. So I gave it mouth to mouth.
If Starbucks delivered, I would be a morning person.
Accidentally walking through the camping aisle at Target every once in a while is about as outdoorsy as I get.
I am a very very very bad influence ... In a good way.
If you watch Jurassic Park backwards, it`s an uplifting film about dinosaurs and people who work together to rebuild an island.
My room isn`t messy. I just prefer to have my favorite items on display.
I wonder if birds look at planes and think "man, I`ve really got to hit the gym"
I dream about naps.
Unless you are selling Thin Mints, don’t ever knock on my door.
Forgotten pocket money is the best!