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I`m not sure if I actually have free time or there are things I`m forgetting to do.
I once tried sniffing coke, but the ice cubes kept getting stuck up my nose.
Is it safe to take off my Winter Solstice Glasses yet?
Yes I am a bad boy ... But your the one that`s going to get spanked.
The word bed looks like a bed.
cofeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffee... Wheeeeeeeeee!
My bank lets me send a text message and it´ll text back with my balance. It´s a cool feature but I didn´t think the LOL was necessary.
Its national shave your... Well, tomorrow is valentine`s day. Just an FYI.
Sometimes I watch sports holding an xbox controller just to screw with my girlfriend`s head...
Life hack: You can park wherever you want if you put your hazard lights on and take your tire off.
A dirty mind is f*cking beautiful!
There should be an "oh my god, shut up already" button.
People born in 1994-1999 have lived in three decades, two centuries, and two millenniums. & they are not even 18 yet.
pharmacy was out of my BP meds...so i bought a baseball bat instead..that works much faster
Going to the toilet without your phone is like going to war without a gun