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No one`s going to do it for you. It`s up to you, to make naps a priority in your life.
I wish Monday was a figment of my imagination.
Facebook account for sale, Friends included...
The best part about being an adult is, nobody can tell you, you can`t have ice cream for breakfast.
There are two types of people...don`t worry you are not one of them.
Nice try, Henry Winkler, but I’m not inclined to take mortgage advice from a guy who lived above the Cunningham’s garage for like ten years.
I think I can survive on Mars since they found water for my coffee.
It’s not a nap unless your face wakes up in a puddle of your own drool.
The only reason any of us can spell laboratory is because of Dexter.
Reasons I check my voicemail: 1% to hear the message. 99% to get rid of that annoying icon.
How Big is Infinity?
Sometimes all you need is a hug or someone to tell you everything will be ok, or some rough sex or whatever...
I`ll be busy tonight taking my girlfriend out to dinner and then having sex all night. Is what I`d be saying if I had money ... or a girlfriend
Oh, honey, you have gone beyond muffin top. That`s a busted can of biscuits!
One thing the porn industry has taught me is that this summer I defiantly need to get a job as a poolboy.