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Have you ever seen the look on a mans face when he is truly sorry? Yeah, me either!
I’ve had no formal martial arts training, but I know for a fact the Power Rangers are wasting too much energy on unnecessary summersaults
Being a pizza delivery driver is great because literally no one is disappointed to see you
Congrats on winning an argument with your woman...... Your prize is a night on the couch.
Another tragedy today in the music industry.....Justin Beiber was just found alive in his apartment. :(
I don`t always get to drink free beer... But I just happen to know my neighbor went to the night shift, and I saw him filling his fridge today.
Any fool can use a computer ... Many do
Your name should be Gelette because you`re the best a man can get
1. OMG will this ever end? 2. OMG will this ever end? 3. OMG will this ever end? - top 3 things on my mind when I`m in a conversation
I did not mean to hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I just figured you already knew.
People are obsessed with this storm but in a couple months no one will talk about it anymore, which is why they named it after the movie Juno.
People who sit and talk while their pizza is gets cold gives me anxiety.
Vodka mixes well with everything, except decisions.
When there is nothing to do ... That`s what I do
In the South, they remove the `g` from the end of most words. Just sayin`.