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Don`t rush me, I`m waiting until the last minute.
Any question is a hard hitting question when it`s written on a brick and thrown full force at your face.
Doing some caroling! All by myself. In people`s backyards. In the bushes. Very little singing. Mostly watching. -Bfanch
People who say `expresso` instead of `espresso,` may I axe you to please stop? Thanx.
Why is it when you run into a spider web, you suddenly turn into a ninja?
Neighbor said hi again. I`m just gonna move
Any woman can make you a Millionaire.. You only have to be a Billionaire first.
Interviewer: "What did you like best about your last job?" Me: "Sometimes, people had birthdays and there was free cake."
As i get older i realize I do a LOT more YOGA...attempting to tie my shoelaces
I would just like to personal thank all the people in my life that have caused me so many problems, for making me the as$ I am today!
Today is that day where anything you read online could be totally made up. Oh, wait, that`s every day.
If you want funny, get off Facebook and watch the news...
I`d love to have kids one day. Two days, tops.
Teacher: Have a seat! Student: Thanks! *picks up the chair and leaves* -- (°_°)
I wonder if birds look at planes and think "man, I`ve really got to hit the gym"