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Confidence is going after Moby Dick in a row boat ... and taking the tartar sauce with you.
It`s possible you drank too much if you have to wait until your court appearance to find out what the hell happened that night
Do you like me? Breathe for yes, lick your elbow for no.
I dig, we dig, he dig, she dig, they dig. It`s not a beautiful poem, but it`s very deep.
If someone asks for advice, just tell em to follow their heart. No idea what that sh!t means but at least they`re not talking to you anymore.
Who picks up a seeing eye dogs poop?
We must STOP the driver of that bus that everyone keeps getting thrown under!
I have no idea how I use to get around in the dark before I had a cell phone.
Just found my TV remote and a newspaper in my fridge. It`s pretty awesome that society lets me live by myself.
Someone once told me, “GO FOR BROKE” !! I’m happy to report that I succeeded…
We should be nicer to old people. When they walked uphill both ways in the snow they had to do it without an internet connection too.
I deserve an Oscar for my performance in "Holy crap this is a terrible gift but I`ll pretend to love it."
LSD makes users lose weight ... That makes sense. It`s kinda hard to get to the fridge when there`s a dragon guarding it.
You´re just jealous because the voices are talking to me and not you!
i dont have drain bramage.