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The guy that thought of wrapping other food items in bacon deserves an award.
People all around the world are out doing interesting and productive things right now. You are reading this.
Despite the high cost of living, it still remains popular.
I just want a reason to dramatically slide across the hood of a car.
Maybe it`s inappropriate for the first date but if there`s a maze on the menu I`m asking for crayons.
I would run a marathon. If the only 2 bars were 26.2 miles apart and the first one was closed.
My mom just sent me a friend request on Facebook! Finally I can use that "I`m not your friend I`m your mother" speech to my advantage.
When people tell me knock knock jokes, I pretend I`m not home.
? Single ? Taken ? Depends on who`s asking.
If someone says they`ll always be there for you...make sure you find out exactly where "there" is.
The best part about being over 40 is we did most of our stupid stuff before the internet.
I`ve started an exercise program. I do 20 sit-ups each morning. That may not sound like a lot, but you can only hit that snooze button so many times.
"You only live once" is also an equally compelling reason not to do something extreme or stupid.
You can get away with farting at the zoo because you can always blame the animals...
No one texts faster than a gossiping woman.