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The best thing about telepathy is... I know, right!?
We had a power outage last week and my PC, TV and games console shut down immediately, so I had to talk to my family for a few hours. They seem like nice people.
Eat whatever you want,and if anyone tries to lecture you about your weight ...Eat them too..!
just realised SATURDAY has the word TURD in it
Be careful who you call friends. I`d rather have 4 quarters than 100 pennies.
When butterflies fall in love, do they feel humans in their stomachs.
Passive aggressive has never been my thing, I prefer chasing you with a chainsaw.
is confused. Oh wait, maybe not.
Hey guy in the car behind me... Honking your horn isn`t going to help me type any faster.
Due To ObamaCare and the poor economy Holiday Cheer this year will be distributed in Shot Glasses...
Alcohol is not the answer, it just makes you forget the question.
Some of the best memories I have are of times right before the cops showed up.
Honey, You really don`t need to drive me crazy, I am close enough to walk.
Ever notice how it`s never your successful friends posting inspirational quotes?
I thought there was a spider on the rug but it was just yarn.....it`s dead yarn now, though.