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Perhaps Nicki Minaj just lost a series of bets.
Women need a tattoo that somehow signals their menstrual cycle ... * A Cramp Stamp
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish my ex wife would die ... That`s as far as I got.
Spilling a full beer you paid for is the adult equivalent of letting go of a balloon.
My wife and I decided to make our own sex tape. She was pissed off when I started holding auditions for her part.
If you`ve ever watched a butcher wrap pork chops, you`ve seen me wrapping Christmas presents.
Often, when I am reading a good book I stop and thank my teacher. Well, I used to. Until she got that restraining order.
To all the lovely ladies here I`m not wearing green....to all the guys here, I know Ju-Jitsu. Just saying
I`m concerned my kids will end up in therapy because I didn`t tell everyone on FB how much I love them.
One time I was in a bar and there was this really weird guy pouring booze all over his hand. Turned out he was trying to get his date drunk
The most unrealistic part of cooking shows is when they have enough room in their fridge to fit an entire baking sheet.
Confuse your doctor by putting on rubber gloves at the same time he does.
News flash! someone just found Carmon Sandiego!
With my luck, I’ll die and get reincarnated as myself.
Kids maybe a gift..... But I like playing with the box it came in.